There is something to be said for aging gracefully.  Nobody wants to be the last one at the party still eating the sushi when everyone else has sensibly gone home.  I think the same is true for fashion.  Everyone from Kate Spade to Alexa Chung will tell you that there is an art to changing your personal style to reflect your time on earth.  Most of the advice involves setting limits but also knowing when to push-back a little.

The two main principles involve length and choice.  Tiny shorts or skirts may no longer be as appropriate when you’re older but perhaps Bermuda shorts or pencil skirts are the way to go?  Also, what you choose in your thirties may not be as appropriate when you’re entering your fifties or sixties only because there is a slight air of desperation associated with it.  But the good news is that legging jeans are for everyone and I hope they never, ever go away.

I once expressed my reticence about taking on certain trends because I’m now a mother, to which my cousin K and bestie K responded, “you don’t look like a mother.”  In a way that made me happy because it meant that I could play around a little longer and not look ridiculous.  I believe that my personal icon when it comes to these things is Gwyneth Paltrow.  Perhaps it’s because I’ve been around girls like her since my early teens that I don’t really get my back up like others might.  She was raised in a privileged setting by two parents who probably had certain expectations for her behavior.  They probably also built up her confidence to the extent that she feels that she has something to offer.  In her case, she just does it in the realm of the lifestyle blog.  She’s not the first and will not be the last, so are all the haters planning on taking out the pitchforks for every wealthy girl down the road?  Truth be told, some of her stuff is great and you can find similar items that are more affordable from other sources.  She’s just giving you some inspiration and I like that she has something to say and something to show.

As a mother of two she also knows how to still keep a part of herself when it comes to her sartorial approach.  Gwyneth will rock the black strapless-shift dress, peasant shirt, distressed jeans and leather leggings all as someone in her early forties.  She doesn’t dress the part and her hair is long but more than anything else she just looks like she still takes care of herself.  That is what is attractive.  A woman who has not lost herself in the process of producing life.

Saying all of this though, I fully believe even though we are far from “there” being a woman in this day and age comes with a great deal of choice and freedom.  You can do whatever you want and wear whatever you want and it’s not anyone’s place to judge.  I don’t think those offering lifestyle advice are trying to tell anyone what to do.  They are just expressing how they’re currently negotiating their own identity and it’s on you to incorporate what you want.  With regards to leather leggings though, yeah, I’d probably go there.